Conversation snippet: Tornado

“You know, I was thinking. What do we do if there’s a tornado?”

“Panic.”

Conversation snippet: Fluffy

“He is not fluffy! He’s a selfish psychopathic bastard!”

“Yes, but in a good way.”

Conversation snippet: Ice-walking

“I hate walking on ice. Did I mention I hate walking on ice?”

“Hmm. . . once or twice.”

“Are you sure? ‘Cause I could mention it again.”

It's not how you say it but how you say it

A page in the Anthropologie catalogue reads:

I know they’re trying to make it sound all dreamy and poetic, but the first thought that came into my mind was: “Oh gawd, she’s going to die.”

Conversation snippet: Depp

“It’s hotter than Johnny Depp out there.”

Conversation snippet: Debit and credit

“Let’s name our kids Debit and Credit.”

“What? No!”

“C’mon, it sounds cute. Or we could name our pets. Heeeeeere, Debit Debit Debit Debit. . .”

Conversation snippet: Ibuprofen

“Guess what?”

“What?”

“I’m taking ibuprofen. Isn’t that great?”

“Uhhhh, that’s. . . nice?”

“Are you sure you’re not on some other drug, dear. . .?”

Conversation snippet: Study

“You’re not studying, are you?”

“No, I’m just. . . looking at the words.”

“Oh suuuuure.”

“No, really. The words are very pretty.”

Conversation snippet: Nice dress

Boy 1: “That’s a nice dress.”

Girl: “Oh, thank you.”

Boy 2 (passing by): “Hm. I wanted to wear something like that today.”

Conversation snippet: Exams

“I have exams Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.”

“You lucky thing.”

“Lucky? I’m just going to die.”

“Even luckier. Then you won’t have to take the exams.”

“Shut up.”