snippets

Conversation snippet: Everybody on vacation

“We’re going out to lunch on Tuesday and we’d like you to join us.”

“Oh, what are we celebrating?”

“We’re celebrating Everybody Is On Vacation And We’re Not.”

Conversation snippet: Deep-fried

“I had this very strange dream last night. There were mice in it. We went out to eat and they served us mice.”

“You mean they had mice around the restaurant?”

“No, I mean deep-fried mice.”

Conversation snippet: Mouse splat

“I don’t want the mouse in my room when I’m studying!”

“Hey, it could be worse. It could be prowling your room when you’re sleeping.”

“Argh! I don’t want to step out of bed and hear, ‘SPLAT!’”

“Well, at least that would get rid of our mouse problem.”

Conversation snippet: Zombies at the beach

“You’ll have fun at the cabin. WHERE THE ZOMBIES WILL GET YOU.”

“No, they won’t. Zombies never go near the ocean.”

“Why is that?”

“Salt water. Too corrosive.”

“But their flesh is falling off anyway.”

“What’s this?”

“Zombies don’t go near the ocean because they get in contact with salt water and just disintegrate.”

“Oh.”

“Ohhh, so that’s why they’re always in urban areas!”

“Yeah, you always find them in the middle of the country. . . .”

“Is that why there are never any zombies in Hawaii?”

“Ohmigawd, now I want to make a movie: ‘Zombies in Hawaii’!”

“That would be so awesome!”

“We could launch a series! ‘Zombies on Spring Break’!”

“‘Zombies in Cancun’!”

“‘Zombies Gone Wild’!”

Conversation snippet: Dumb waiters

“We should get one of those. . . what do you call it? Lazy butlers?”

“Dumb waiters?”

“Yeah, that’s it! . . . Lazy butlers, dumb waiters. . . .”

Law & Order: SVU Valentine's Day cards

Like I told F, if I could send Valentine's Day cards right now, these would absolutely be the sort I'd send to show my love.

(Keep on clicking the images/"Next" to see the whole collection. Fabulous.)

Landed

T-Rex eating Triceratops

Six states, four days, three time zones, two countries.

I’m here, baby.

Batman ice-cream

Just had to share this: Guess what flavor’s in a Batman ice-cream!

I can’t wait to find out the recipe — not only that, the conversation snippets are hilarious:

“Tasty, tasty Batman.”

“If Batman were to sit down with a pint and a tear-jerker movie (say, one afternoon with nothing better to do—a broken leg maybe?) COULD THIS BE THE ICE CREAM HE PICKS UP?”

“Does it taste like vigilantes?”

NIGHTWING ice cream! Great thought! It would need to have a hint of ‘chip on shoulder’, I’m guessing? Just how would that taste, I wonder. Could I somehow include sour grapes without being over the top?”

Love it!

Can't fault a guy for his enthusiasm

There is nothing like a bird randomly giving his chirpiest of chirps as he sits on your left shoulder, and you find your left ear ringing and deaf for the next few minutes.

Oh, Peepster. You don’t know your own strength.

Yes, still away

Super-JB (we loveses our precious, yes we do) is at work right now, so I’m noting down random things:

I have gotten tan, and I’m not even in M’sia yet (go Cali). My, is it apparent that I’ve been wearing a halter-top.

You should definitely go to Turtle Talk with Crush if ever you have the chance. It is live, interactive, and hilarious.

“Well, there’s Squirt. . . Shel. . . Shelby. . . Sheldon. . . Shel-a-del-a-ding-dong. . . There’re the twins, Bill and Ted. . . the teens, Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, Raphael. . . .”—Crush, in reply to an audience question about the names of his 6400 kids.

Also a favorite: when he referred to a bawling audience baby as a “youngling practicing his dolphin cry.” Awesome.

Earlier that day, S had called me because Peepster would not step up to go back in his cage. Li’l misfit. Sin was better behaved, said S. If anything, I’d‘ve expected it to be the other way around. But S put me on speakerphone, and I told Peeps very clearly that he was to step up and behave, no biting, and ooooh, good bird! Later, S said that as soon as Peeps heard my voice, he must’ve thought, “Whoops, I better behave,” because he did what he was supposed to.

Myself, I’d like to think that he thought, “Hmm, okayyyyy. . . I guess if Mommy supports S and gives her the all-clear, then I’d better accept S’s word, then.” ‘Cause I don’t think he’s given her any trouble after that.

Well, fingers crossed.

(So cute.)