Conversation snippet: Netscape quit

“I’ve been having trouble connecting.”

“Have you tried quitting Netscape and starting it again?”

“How do you do that?”

“. . . Go to File and Quit.”

Conversation snippet: Claws

“Let me see your bow.”

“You don’t like my bow?”

“See, your hands, when you bow, they become like claws. . . I don’t mean to make you self-conscious.”

“Too late!”

Conversation snippet: Ice-walking

“I hate walking on ice. Did I mention I hate walking on ice?”

“Hmm. . . once or twice.”

“Are you sure? ‘Cause I could mention it again.”

It's not how you say it but how you say it

A page in the Anthropologie catalogue reads:

a pick
two hammers
a compass
broken shells
several maps
a handful of sand
one flashlight
(no batteries)
a glove
In The Maine Woods
graph paper
a notepad
many pencils
one good pen

I know they’re trying to make it sound all dreamy and poetic, but the first thought that came into my mind was: “Oh gawd, she’s going to die.”