Genma was absolutely terrified for them.

He wasn't terrified of them. He knew their little tics, knew what to say and what to do to get them out of a fit. He knew how they fought, Kakashi dirty and Neji upright, and he knew how to get them pinned to the ground in half a moment, even if it was by cheating.

No, Genma was terrified for them. Because for all their genius, for all the brilliant ideas and plans and plots between them, they had no common sense. Whenever it rained, Kakashi stood there, staring up at the clouds, Sharingan spinning lazily. Neji would creep into a corner when the wind blew, and couldn't be coaxed out. They had their problems, their little inconsistencies and paradoxes and errors in their programming. They weren't perfect.

They were expendable.

And that's what this mission was. Send the two geniuses out with a keeper, someone to watch over them and make sure Kakashi didn't gut himself and Neji didn't hang himself, and for God's sake, make sure they don't choke! And make sure that they kill the missing-nin, and if they die in the action, well, Konoha always has more geniuses. And those geniuses, the ones kept safe at home, they were sane. Deliciously, delectably sane.

Genma thought 'sane' was a very boring word.

"Kakashi," he said, eyes still closed. It wasn't his watch yet, he still had a few more hours, but he could smell Kakashi smoking, and he wondered when the younger man picked up the habit. "Kakashi, put the cigarette out."

There was silence for a moment, then the sound of a cigarette being stubbed out, the sizzle of the ashes, and the smell of smoke slowly dissipated. "Genma?" Kakashi's voice was a slow, lazy drawl. Genma laid an arm over his eyes, sighed.

"Yes, Kakashi?"

"Wanna fuck?"

Genma thought about it for a moment, ran through the dialogues in his head. "No, not really." "Sure, what the hell." He ran over Kakashi's responses, too. "Alright." "Alright." He ran through every single possibility, and then the possibilities that weren't so possible. He finally sighed again, turning his head a bit, lowering his arm to look at Kakashi.

"Now's not such an awesome time," he said, and Kakashi lifted his visible eyebrow.

"It's not? We're not walking away from this mission, Genma. We're going to die."

Genma sat up a bit, glancing to where Neji had been sleeping earlier. The young man, more a boy than anything, was pointedly looking at them, white eyes fixed on them both. "You upset about that?" Genma asked mildly, turning back to Kakashi.

Kakashi leaned forward, a conspirator's look on his face. "Just wondering why they hadn't done it sooner. Me and Neji, we're fucked up inside, right here." He tapped his forehead, next to the tilted hitai-ate, and his eye didn't quite curve into something from a smile.

Genma thought it over some more, ran through all the actions. He had to keep the two alive, get them at least part of the way through the mission. He heard Neji move, a shift over broken blades of grass, and he glanced up above him, looked at the dark sky.

"Still going to be night for a few hours," he said softly. "We don't need to move yet."

Kakashi pulled his mask down, a strange smile on his face. "Who you want? Me or Neji?" He crawled over as he spoke, moving closer until he was climbing over Genma, lowering his head next to Genma's.

"Neji?" Genma asked, wincing at his stupidity, and Kakashi kissed him. It wasn't a kiss to be remembered, Genma decided. It was dry, without much behind it. A pressing of dry lips and drier lips, and all Genma could think was that he needed to get some more water into Kakashi before the copy-nin got dehydrated. He was about to push Kakashi off him, apologize and grab a canteen and talk the younger man into drinking some water, when someone grabbed his dick. He jumped, mashing his teeth against his lower lip and cutting it.

"Wha?" he asked, the tang of blood on his tongue. Kakashi shoved his tongue into Genma's mouth as Genma tried to pull away, and then there were limbs and tongues and hands, these hands that grabbed and pulled and hurt, in a way that felt peculiarly good. For a moment, Genma entertained the thought that maybe he was just as crazy as them, that maybe he was the reason they were sent on this little mission, to get rid of him. He gagged on the taste of blood, pushed at Kakashi's shoulders, and turned his face away.

"God," he spat out blood, "stop for a minute." Neji's hand paused on Genma's cock, fingers light and gentle and soft as a girl's. Kakashi sat back on his heels, letting a hand rest on Genma's chest for balance, and looked amused.

"Too much, Genma?" Kakashi asked mildly, and Genma bristled at that tone. He was the one who took care of them, not the other way around.

"Made me cut my lip," Genma muttered, touching his fingers to his lip and pulling them away to look at the blood. "Stupid-"

"Stupid?" Neji asked, and Genma jumped again. The boy-man looked up under hair that should have been on a girl's head, with eyes that looked as wide as a girl's, and Genma felt his stomach drop out in a moment of confusion.

"Stupid," Genma repeated vaguely, and when Kakashi leaned forward, kissing him again, he didn't try to crawl out from underneath. He didn't fight it when both of the younger men straddled him, Neji over his legs, Kakashi over his stomach, or when Neji took him in his mouth, or when Kakashi slit his throat.

"Stupid," Kakashi said conversationally, leaning back with a smile on his face. There was blood on his lips, Genma noted, and resolved to get more water into the copy-nin before the younger man got dehydrated. Neji looked up at him, come on his lips, and Genma decided that he was the prettiest girl-boy-man he'd ever seen. And there were these hands, soft and insistent and gentle, and when did men have gentle hands?

"Stupid," Neji repeated after Kakashi, wiping his mouth, and Genma sighed, but the air wasn't coming in and out of his mouth very well anymore. Kakashi leaned forward, a fast bop that made Genma's vision swim, and Genma could feel Kakashi's lips, light and gentle, on his cheek. Like his mother, Genma thought. Soft lips, like his mother, kissing him goodnight. Goodnight, goodnight, sweet prince, and lullaby. No, lullabye. Bye and bye and farewell.

"Sorry," Kakashi whispered in his ear. "Sorry, Genma, sorry."

And Genma closed his eyes.

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