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Notes: Thanks to Sas and Mica. :) Feedback me. It'll make me healthy. No, really . . . Other stories can be found at my lair. See the link at the bottom.

Growing Up A Superhero (26)
The Flying Purple People Eater 1/1
JBMcDragon

"There," Scott said, straightening with a grimace. He put one hand at the small of his back, arching backward and hearing it crack loudly. Then he looked up from his kneeling position next to the bunk beds, up into the calm blue of his son's eyes on the top bunk, and the turbulent green of his daughter's eyes on the bottom bunk. "There are no monsters under the bed."

"They're hiding in the dark," Cody said, just as it seemed that Brigette was willing to believe her father's words. Her head snapped around, curly strawberry blond hair braided back. Worried eyes looked at Scott searchingly.

"They're not hiding in the dark," Scott said, shaking his head. "I can see in the dark because of my visor. They can't hide from me."

Brigette sat in the middle of her bed, her knees tucked up to her chin and all limbs pulled tightly away from the edges where possible monsters might get them. "But it's not any normal monster, Dad," she said forlornly. "It's a people eating monster. And it must be real."

Scott shook his head and glanced at the bedside clock. It was nine thirty. He sighed and ran and a hand through his hair, mussing it tiredly. Several thick brown locks fell in front of his red glasses, obscuring his vision. "I promise there's no monster."

"Check the closet, Dad," Cody said quietly from the top bunk. Scott craned his neck, looking up at the four-year-old twin. Finally, he stood and walked to the closet, opening it a crack and peering inside before throwing the doors open for his children to see.

"No monsters," he said, gesturing at the closet stuffed with clothes on hangars, a dresser set, a laundry basket with clothes all around it and a box of discarded toys. "Although your mother," Scott picked up a shirt off the floor and pointed it at each of the twins, "would be very unhappy if she knew you weren't even putting your clothes in the hamper. You know that's part of your job."

Cody sighed and flopped backward on his bed, arms outstretched and brown hair fanning across his mattress. "Mom doesn't care--you do."

"They're hiding in the dresser!" Brigette declared, pointing with one chubby finger before hiding her hand back under the blanket.

Scott opened each of the dresser drawers, peering inside them and leaving them open as he checked the next. "No monsters," he said, looking back at Brigette. "Now, it's past your bedtime. Long past your bedtime. You know that all the X-Men will help you if you need it--they're just up the hill. All you have to do is scream, remember?"

Brigette nodded. Cody didn't move from his sprawled position, that Scott could see.

"Right. There are no monsters. I'm going to be just in the next room, okay?"

Brigette nodded again. Cody still didn't appear to move.

Scott opened the door, walking out of the bedroom and leaving the door cracked behind him. He was no farther than ten feet down the hall when Brigette shouted for him. He sighed and turned back, opening the door and sticking his head in. "Yes?"

"It ran from behind the door and under the bed!"

Cody was looking around now, too, his blanket-covered rump sticking up behind him. Only his face peered out near the edge of the bed, blue eyes glittering in the yellow glow from the nightlight. Scott gazed at both his children a moment, thinking. Then he entered the room and sat down by the bunk, looking very seriously at his twins. "Okay," he said, "in order to catch it I have to be sneaky. So first, why don't you tell me what it looks like?"

"It had a horn!" Brigette answered instantly.

"And one eye, right here!" Cody added, a fist appearing and knocking against his forehead.

"No, here!" Brigette said, though she hadn't seen where Cody had pointed. She poked at Scott's forehead, and he closed his eyes as her finger wobbled on his skin.

"And it had little red wings!" Cody said, sitting up and casting off his blanket so he could flap his hands by his shoulders.

"And purple scales! Like . . . like Aunt Betsy's hair!" Brigette grabbed her yellow blanket and pulled it tight around herself, peering at the floor suspiciously.

"So, it was a one eyed, one horned, flying purple--" Scott stopped before finishing the lyrics. If his children hadn't made that connection, he wouldn't make it for them. He didn't even know if they had ever heard that song. "--monster?"

"YEAH!" both twins said excitedly.

"And it eats people!" Brigette added.

Scott nodded, more than slightly suspicious himself now. "What's it called?"

"A one eyed, one horned, flying purple people eater!" Cody answered instantly.

"Who told you about it?" Scott asked carefully, trying not to seem like he was irritated.

"Uncle Bobby," Brigette said. "It's scary."

Scott nodded again. "Yeah. It looks pretty scary, doesn't it?" he said, thinking quickly.

"Yeah," Brigette agreed. Cody covered himself in his blanket again and nodded from beneath it.

"But you know why it was hiding behind the door?"

Cody's head poked out, and he looked at Scott while Brigette asked, "Why?"

"Because it's shy."

Brigette looked at Scott and sighed heavily. "No, Dad, it's a monster! And it eats people!"

"Yes," Scott said slowly, "but it only eats flying purple people."

Brigette looked doubtful. Cody giggled. "Really?" Brigette asked, her disbelief apparent.

"Yeah. Oh, that monster is very friendly and horribly shy. You see, he knows that he's supposed to be a monster, but he likes being nice. So he only eats flying purple people, and that way he never has to eat anyone."

Both children were quiet for a moment, considering that.

"What if Warren gets a sunburn and goes flying?" Brigette asked finally.

Scott thought quickly. "It doesn't count," he said, "because Warren's not naturally purple all the time."

"What if Betsy and Warren go flying, and the monster thinks Betsy is purple?" Cody asked, nearly hanging over the edge of the bed now.

"Doesn't count, because the monster is smart and knows that Betsy isn't the one flying. Warren is flying, and Betsy is just along for the ride."

"Sometimes I see Betsy and Warren flying, and Warren drops Betsy and catches her," Brigette said, giggling. "And Betsy yells at him, but she's always laughing, too."

"They're pretty silly," Scott agreed solemnly.

"What if," Cody said, still pondering the monster problem, "Mom lifts Betsy up, and Betsy's wearing purple?"

"Betsy's face isn't purple," Scott said, "so it still doesn't count."

Cody looked at him suspiciously.

"But Dad!" Brigette said, pounding her mattress with both fists. "The monster is still under my bed!"

"That's because he likes you!" Scott said. "You see, he's very shy and he doesn't have any friends, so he thinks that maybe if he protects you from the other monsters you'll be his friends."

Brigette looked thoughtful and nodded, grabbing her blankets and hurling them up over her body as she laid down.

Cody, however, was still looking at Scott suspiciously.

He had always been the harder one to convince, Scott knew. "Yes?"

"How do you know about the monster?" Cody asked, eyeing his father.

Scott stood up, coming up almost to a level with Cody's eyes. "Because I'm the dad, and I know everything that goes on here."

"Then why didn't you know it was hiding behind the door?" Cody asked.

Scott paused. "I did," he said at last. "But I thought you guys knew he was a harmless monster. I was only looking for the dangerous ones."

Cody looked at him for another long moment, searching Scott's face for something; Scott wasn't sure what. Then, finally, he nodded once and laid down.

Scott breathed a silent sigh of relief, and walked to the door. "Good night Cody, good night Brig," he said quietly.

"Say good night to the monster, Dad!" Brigette called.

Scott hesitated. "Good night, monster," he said at last.

"The monster says good night back!" Brigette announced.

Scott smiled and left the room.

The carpet was thick under his feet as he padded down the hall, peering into his adopted daughter's room. She sat at her desk, furiously scribbling in a notebook, her feet tucked under her chair and her toes under a massive paw. Yellow eyes looked up at Scott from beneath the desk, and the creature yawned hugely, showing rows of sharp teeth. Scott made a mental note to call the zoo vet again, have them come out for the monthly check to make sure the liger was still healthy. The last thing he needed was to get in trouble--again--for owning a large cat. At least now it was registered, even if that did mean they had to constantly jump through legal hoops.

"Chiya?"

She turned and smiled at him, then was caught by a yawn.

"Don't stay up too late, okay?"

She nodded, setting down her pen and signing, #I won't. Homework.# She gestured at the papers before her, and Scott nodded.

"Test tomorrow?"

She nodded and made a face, propping her head up on the heel of one hand.

"Okay. Good luck, hon."

She nodded absently, then turned, moving her fingers rapidly to catch Scott's attention. #Tommy called from school. Call him back tomorrow, okay?#

Scott nodded, smiling. "I will. Thanks."

Chiya smiled and turned back to her papers, dropping one hand to absently scratch at the faint stripes on Lion's shoulder.

Scott continued down the hall, entering the main foyer and from there crossing to the kitchen. There, he picked up the phone and glanced at the clock--quarter to ten. Swiftly, Scott punched at the dialing pad with his middle finger, putting the portable phone to his ear.

"Hello, Bobby?" he said after a moment. "How old is Jessie?" There was a pause, then Scott smiled in a humorless way. "I can't wait until she's old enough to understand about monsters. And then you can stay up all night assuring her that what Uncle Scott said about the one eyed, one horned, flying purple people eater really isn't true." With a great deal of satisfaction, Scott hung up the phone on Bobby's stuttering protests.

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