Why Is It Hard?
Disclaimer: Characters are property of one
little idea that came from a conversation I had
dear Archeeka... Yes. She helped me nurture
bit of crack-seed into the wonderful
become. She also beta'd and I'm very, very
that. Much love.
implied Kankuro/Kiba, implied Gaara/Naruto,
masturbation, and crack humour.
I HAVE TO DO IT?!"
in a dark glare, one hand shooting out to grab
of Kankuro's shirt and drag him down to eye
scowled right back at her.
idiot!" She hissed, glancing over her shoulder
to see if Gaara had reacted, "You have to do it
you're his big brother and there aren't any
around to explain these things to him!" Kankuro
and removed Temari's hand from his shirt with a
disdainful wrinkle of his nose.
big sister! You know more about this shit than
anyway! You go explain it!" He raised an
at his sister, shifted into an expectant,
stance. He then very narrowly avoided the hard
her closed fan, swung just over his
the hell would I know more? Did you just call
slut?! COME BACK HERE AND GIVE YOUR LITTLE
TALK, YOU BASTARD!"
Just twenty minutes
Kankuro had been minding his own business. He'd
very happily sitting alone in his own bedroom,
his head to the thrumming beat of the music in
headphones while he carefully adjusted Karasu's
He hadn't been thinking about sex, or Kiba- who
the way back in Konoha, dammit- or anything
remotely like that. For once.
it. That strange, yet familiar tingle across
the back of
his neck. That feeling that made him shiver,
grumble, and then twist around out of sheer
habit to make sure that there weren't any enemy
waiting there to jump him.
There were no
nin, of course. No. Just his little brother,
over his chest, troubled, faintly irritated
look on his
face, sand gourd strapped to his back.
Kankuro a moment longer than it should have to
who it was standing in his doorway. When it
did, he made
an undignified sound that he would have much
not to remember, yanked his headphones off, and
to his feet. Even after almost three years of
sanity, sometimes- just sometimes- Gaara still
The silence that stretched out
was thick and heavy. Kankuro's instincts had
kicked in, telling him that he should run, and
run immediately. No good could possibly
whatever was about to follow.
Kankuro had gotten into the habit of ignoring
"What do you want, squirt?"
at length, shoving his hands into his pockets.
in the back of his mind was screaming at him-
piss him off! Even if he won't kill you, he can
kick your ass!'
Gaara's face twisted
bit, just for the briefest moment, almost as if
trying to figure out just what it was he was
there, looming in Kankuro's doorway. He
hesitated just a
bit longer before answering.
Was all he said, forehead creasing minutely in
agitation. Immediately, Kankuro's mind began
problem? Hesitantly, he gave a slight nod of
"What sort of
spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully. To
immense surprise, Gaara's gaze darted away for
"It's hard," There was a slight
and Kankuro's mind was sluggish, trying to work
little brother's reply, "This has never
"It- wha-" And then it hit and
eyes were impossibly wide, "Whoa- WHOA! You-
Gaara had no
Kankuro could move that quickly.
now, here he
was, sitting on Kankuro's bed, waiting as
he could- at Temari's request- half listening
siblings argue down the hall. It sounded as if
had become physical. He recognized the dull
Temari's fan missing Kankuro's head and hitting
A moment later, the puppeteer
into his bedroom and slammed the door shut
himself just in time to block the flurry of
that had been thrown after him. He immediately
around and glared, presenting the closed door
"Dammit! YOU DON'T FIGHT
Y'KNOW THAT, YOU BITCH?!"
back to Gaara.
his temples and set to pacing, occasionally
Gaara's direction and grumbling to himself. He
every now and again, crossed his arms over his
gave his little brother a thoughtful one-eyed
only to quickly start pacing again. Once or
made an attempt at saying something, but didn't
much more than "I- you- it's just- GAH!" before
his hands up in the air in frustration and gave
trying to speak.
Finally, he realized
longer he stalled, the longer he'd have to
through this. Might as well get it over with.
With a long, maybe a bit
sigh, he grabbed his desk chair and spun it
face the redhead sitting across the room. He
down in it and pinched the bridge of his nose,
sort out his scattered thoughts.
was so not
normal, it wasn't even funny.
to look at Gaara again, taking careful note of
younger teen's posture and expression. Opened
then shut it again with an audible click of
had no idea how to even start.
still...?" He trailed off, making a vague
fought down the blush that was threatening to
his cheeks. For a moment, he thought he'd
rather be out
in the hall, dealing with Temari and her fan.
a slight quirk of a nonexistent
Gaara's gaze flicked down between his own legs
quickly that Kankuro had to wonder if he
it, "Yes. And it's becoming uncomfortable,"
easily translated into 'Fix this now or I'll
my mind about that whole 'no more senseless
thing', and Kankuro knew it.
okay," The puppeteer shifted a bit nervously,
his arms over his chest again as he slouched
his seat, "What were you doing when it...
Gaara was silent, something like thoughtfulness
face, before he tilted his head just
was sitting on the roof, thinking about
Naruto," He replied with a small frown. He
seemed to be
attempting to figure out what pondering
strategies had to do with his
Fighting?" Kankuro echoed with an incredulously
eyebrow. Gaara blinked back at
"Just fighting?" Now Gaara
suspicious, tipping his head back just
give the older teen a careful, measuring look.
"... Yes," He repeated slowly, "What
I be thinking of doing?" Kankuro made an odd
that and shook his head quickly,
pause. Kankuro was trying desperately not to
his little brother and Naruto, and at the same
trying to come up with some way to explain
Without utterly humiliating himself,
It wasn't helping that Gaara was
quickly getting impatient. Who'd have thought
see the great, terrifying Sabaku no Gaara
"How long has it been?" Kankuro
suddenly, forcing himself to break the tense
"Forty-eight minutes," The younger boy
glancing at the clock on the wall, and then
back at his
brother. He was frowning again. Kankuro
froze mid-sympathetic wince, "Why did this
how do I fix it?"
"How the fuck should I
why? Fighting doesn't normally turn
on," He stopped, and rethought that,
a certain Leaf mutt shoving him back against a
kissing him roughly after a morning spent
trickling into his scattered brain. Well. Maybe
turned some people on...
and shook his head again, shoving the impending
images away before his body had a chance to
"A-Anyway... Just go jerk off, and you'll be
Oh, his day
reached a whole new level of disturbing.
couldn't stop the faint tinge of pink in his
he realized that Gaara had absolutely no idea
was talking about, and he was going to have to
that too. Nothing was ever simple, was
"Yeah, you just... you..." He made a
obscene pumping gesture with one hand and hoped
hope that Gaara would understand. Gaara's
frown clearly stated that he did not. Kankuro
hands into the air, frustrated again, "You're
fifteen! How can you not
was wholly unprepared for the next thing to
come out of
his brother's mouth.
serious. Kankuro choked, then doubled over in a
fit. He wondered if he could make it out the
before Temari caught on and beat the crap out
of him for
"Dude- no," He didn't sit up
Couldn't quite bring himself to look at Gaara
then. He hid his face behind his hands, sure
were going to burn right off of his head,
Fuck. I dunno! Go take a cold shower or
Gaara hesitated, giving Kankuro a measuring
"A cold shower will... fix it?"
twitched, just slightly.
tense and pained. He was just short of begging
redhead to leave so that he could piece his
together and suffer through his trauma alone.
weren't enough words to describe how relieved
when Gaara got up and walked swiftly
who had remained vigilantly outside of
just in case he decided to try running again-
decency to wait until Gaara was out of earshot
she burst out laughing.
Gaara stared at
shower head for a very long time, suspicious,
finally stepped under it and turned the water
on as cold
as it went. To his credit, he held in the
clawed its way up the back of his throat at the
He didn't, however, stop himself
jerking away from the icy spray and flattening
against the opposite wall. His eyes were wide.
were shaking. He was still hard,
And Kankuro? Kankuro was
the door in
Temari's face with a scowl and another flash of
middle finger, and then returned to poor,
Karasu, keeping his hands busy while he
the advantages of having his brain bleached. It
terribly long, though, before his peace was
again. This time, Gaara was a bit more than
He was fucking pissed.
"I'm going to kill you," Gaara informed
brother rather helpfully, voice dropping down
into a low
and dangerous place. Kankuro made his second
noise of the day and scrambled away from the
sand creeping across the floor.
out as more of a squeak than Kankuro would have
but at the moment, his pride was rather lower
list of priorities. Gaara's eyes
still hard," Slow, even, dripping with
"And it hurts," Kankuro's back hit the wall.
the sand had stopped coming at him, pausing
between Gaara's feet and his own.
just listen, okay?" He took a deep, shuddering
"There's a plan C, alright?" Gaara's left eye
"Just... calm down... And think of something
related to fighting or that Uzumaki idiot.
of the most disgusting, nonsexual thing
come up with."
The tiny, often ignored
in him said that Gaara's hesitation was a good
"... This will fix it?"
carefully, drawing the sand back. Kankuro
"Yeah. Just wait it out. Keep
on something else," Another deep breath, eyeing
little brother cautiously, "And don't...
Gaara blinked. Kankuro
Why would I touch it?" Kankuro decided that
bleaching would definitely not be sufficient.
have to kill himself and get it over
would you- Gah!" He smacked himself in the
cursing his own stupidity. Now he was back
started, "Because... because! That's what
do! That's- you- I don't even-"
on spluttering and making useless gestures-
flailing a bit, even tugging on handfuls of his
hair- for a few minutes longer. Gaara didn't
notice. His pale green eyes were glazed over
unfocused look of someone coming to some sort
epiphany. Suddenly, things were falling into
"Wait," Gaara's voice put a quick stop
brother's flustered fit, Kankuro freezing and
with an almost frightened expectancy on his
mean, if I..." He copied the lewd gesture
made before, "It will... go away?"
A, yes," Kankuro mumbled, laughing weakly and
Gaara's steady gaze, "Masturbation leads to
orgasm leads to lack of hard dick," He rubbed
of his neck and hoped the embarrassed flush on
cheeks wasn't too obvious.
Gaara nodded slightly, then gave Kankuro one
measuring glance before he turned on his heel
out of the room once more.
between his own thighs with the same suspicious
hesitance he'd looked at the shower, earlier.
so sure how much trust he was willing to put in
brother, at this point, but it hurt. It
And despite what Kankuro had said- maybe
of what Kankuro had said- he couldn't really
thinking of Naruto anymore. He was really
running out of
So, it was with a slow,
reluctance that he pushed his pants down, just
hips, just far enough. His eyes widened
minutely as he
gazed down at himself, at the purplish, almost
look of his flesh and the trickle of clear
the tip. He found himself wondering, again,
had to do with this.
This should be
Kankuro made it sound that way. Made it sound
something normal, natural. Gaara had never been
good at either of those things.
It was a
five minutes before he finally brought himself
to do it.
Touch, that is. Brushing his fingertips over
of his cock, surprising himself with an odd
his leg and a quick, sudden intake of breath.
supposed to happen?
fingers around his erection, and pumped once.
and paused, wondering inwardly at the strange,
noise that had slipped off of his tongue. And
did it again. Because really, this wasn't so
A few more times, and Gaara felt
drooping, his heartbeat quickening. The tingle
becoming more a shock, an electric crackle over
skin, along his nerve endings. A foreign
low in his stomach, curling his toes against
bedsheets. His hips jerked, his spine arched.
to stop, to figure out why his body was doing
against his will, but he couldn't quite bring
It was sort of a burning, but not,
burns were supposed to hurt and he was positive
this was the farthest thing from pain he'd ever
made him want something, planted seeds
frantic desperation in the pit of his belly,
couldn't even begin to fathom what it was he
He was distantly aware
sound of his own breath as it left him, panting
rocked against his own hand, confused by
too far gone to really care. The world was
narrowing down to the shaky rhythm, the rub of
against his aching arousal, the slick slide of
being spread against his flesh. There was a
pressure building in his stomach, and muscles
between his legs, all at the same time,
snap or explode or maybe just collapse
strange part was that Gaara wanted it
he understood why or not.
He could feel
prickling, sweat beading. Could feel the
his spine every time he drew his palm up, the
buck of hips every time he slid back down. He
things that had no name or shape. He wanted
this to be
over and done with, but never wanted it to end.
And then, he had it. He was
didn't even register the sand rushing up behind
protect his skull from the wall as his head
back. His eyes were wide, but unfocused, the
fading out as his vision went blindingly white.
There was a choked, startled cry over
of blood in his ears as that feeling he
swelled and finally crested. It came crashing
around him again with a jerk and shudder,
unreasonably exhausted. He slumped back against
beside his bed and waited patiently for this
contentedness to drain away.
It was a
before he noticed the stickiness against his
found it much harder to lift his arm than it
been. The white liquid was spilled over his
dripping down his wrist, bringing about a slow,
blink, and with a certain level of lingering
childishness, he popped one finger into his
immediately regretted it, yanking his hand away
turned his head and spat.
for so much. Peace, quiet, only two emotionally
incidents per day. That was all he wanted,
He hadn't left his room since Temari
him back in that morning, and wasn't planning
anymore. He'd tried to lose himself in the
blare of his
music, the concentrated precision of chakra
even the complete bliss of sleep.
he couldn't get very far with any of it before
dragged him, kicking and screaming, back to the
with Gaara. He couldn't even think about Kiba,
going full circle on him. Kissing, touching,
rubbing, hands, cocks, masturbation and
little brothers masturbating- which he really
liked to keep out of his
making another attempt at a nap when there was
knock at his door.
maybe, but he thought he had a right to be at
little bit irrational after what he'd been
picked his head up and frowned when the door
open anyway, and there was Temari, hands on her
she walked into his room without waiting for
"Dinner's ready," She
staring at him expectantly. His frown slipped
outright glare before she spoke again, "I made
hamburgers," He perked
her eyes, "Now quit sulking and come eat," She
slight jerk of her head, in the direction of
kitchen. Kankuro scowled, but pushed himself up
"I don't sulk," He
petulantly. She snorted back at him, but made
comment, waiting patiently as he sat up on the
his bed and stretched. He was just getting to
when an odd, somewhat disconcerting thought
came to him
out of the blue, "Uh... Temari?"
head a bit, "Yeah?"
rubbed the bridge of his nose, looking very
sheepish, "I mean... You don't have like... a
girlfriend or something, do you?"
didn't see her fist swing around to meet the
top of his
head and knock him back onto his bed
course not! What the hell kind of question is
winced and scooted away from her- just in case
decided to attack again- before folding his
his chest, staring down at his lap, and
response. Temari's eyebrow quirked upward,
that?" The pink tinge to her little brother's
actually sort of cute, if she thought about
"I said I was just wondering if it
genetic or something," He repeated, a bit
looking up at her through his bangs.
what?" She was genuinely confused, and Kankuro
a bit more, quickly glancing away
'Cause I guess Gaara's got this thing for that
idiot, and then there's me and Kiba, and...
He stood abruptly and slipped his hands easily
pockets, "You said you made hamburgers?" Temari
at him, and then gave a slight smile, shaking
at the utter weirdness her brother had grown up
"Yeah. Gaara wanted
winced, but followed his sister down to the
and Kankuro was thankful for that. Gaara was
silent through the meal. In fact, he hardly
from the nearly raw hamburger patty he was
poking at the
whole time. At Temari's tentative questioning-
your food alright, Gaara?'- he simply
took a bite to appease her.
after dinner, while Temari was grudgingly
dishes, that Gaara cornered his brother again,
at him hard. Kankuro had cursed inwardly and
outwardly. Gaara did not seem put off in the
"What is it now, shrimp?" The
wasn't about to admit how much that familiar,
look on his younger sibling's face scared
"You never explained why that
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