Iruka moved hesitantly towards the decayed-looking hut, not trusting his eyes until he saw the stones etched with Konoha's leaf spiral and the character "pain" standing on either side of the building's front steps.

"This is it, right?" he asked Kakashi.

"Unh," was all the injured jounin could manage in response. At least he was still responding.

"OK, we're almost there then, just hang on a little more." Iruka mentally rehearsed the Akehirogeru jutsu, deciding that he could probably manage a one-handed version that would allow him to keep a better grip on Kakashi. "Can I let go of one of your legs for a minute? I need to make the unlocking seal."

"Unh." Kakashi tried to tighten his hold on Iruka's back, but when the supporting hand left his thigh, his leg fell heavily. A horror of pain tore through his abdomen at the movement, and only the barest thread of control kept him from screaming.

Iruka felt it immediately - the violent surge in Kakashi's chakra as he struggled to overmaster the agony of his dangling leg straining abdominal muscles, pulling the edges of the belly wound apart.

"Oh gods, I'm hurting you!" He hunched forward, stooping to keep Kakashi's weight centered over his own, as he hurriedly formed the one-handed sequence of seals to allow them admittance to the old building.

Kakashi wanted to respond, but he couldn't, his world was spiraling tighter and tighter, smaller and smaller. It was all he could do to stay conscious against the rising tide of pain. The mayaku no senbon was thoroughly depleted, leaving his nerves once again free to send their desperate signals from the horrific sword wound bisecting his abdomen. The nerves themselves were keyed up to unnatural sensitivity from the neurotoxin in the poisoned kunai wound between his broken ribs, and every muscle hummed with tension from the twitching fibers. He tried to focus on simply breathing, but even that was fraught with difficulty and pain. The injured man groaned, then gave a wet, strangled sounding cough; bloody froth spattered against the back of his helper's neck.

'He's losing it,' Iruka thought frenziedly. 'I've got to get him inside.' As he completed the last step to the unlocking jutsu, the door of the hut swung open. The chuunin quickly reached around to take hold of the leg he had dropped, doing his best not to jar the panting ninja on his back. But moving the leg again was one stimulus too many, the final push that sent Kakashi over the edge, starting a chain reaction in his body that both shinobi were helpless to halt.

The jounin arched backwards, limbs thrashing and trunk muscles clenching in agonizing spasms, twisting away from Iruka. It was as if his own body were throwing him from the chuunin's back. The pain was unbearable; Kakashi's conscious control utterly destroyed. A raw, ragged howl rose from his throat, a sound that seemed to come from the very pit of Hell. From the eaves of the building a startled pair of bats rose on fluttering wings into the night sky. Iruka whirled around in a vain attempt to catch him before he struck the ground, while with the infinite mercy of the central nervous system, Kakashi blacked out.

"Kashi! Kakashi!" Iruka was frantic. His love lay insensate and convulsing on his back, his knapsack under him arching Kakashi's body further than the spasms. The sheathed katana strapped to his left hip jutted up at a crazy angle, his flailing body making an unintended club of the weapon. As he writhed, Kakashi's sweater rode up, revealing a growing blot of fresh blood on his bandaged abdomen.

'Shit! Shit! A seizure! He's bleeding again! He can't breathe! Gods help me, please!' Iruka watched with a growing sense of panicked powerlessness as Kakashi's face took on an ashen color, the over-arched tension of his trunk stopping his breath. Trying to free him from the entangling equipment, Iruka grabbed Kakashi's twitching shoulders, using a kunai to slice through the straps of his backpack. He yanked it from under the convulsing man, reaching next for the sword's fittings, but before he could loose it, the heavy katana banged savagely into Kakashi's injured ribs, then clouted Iruka across the temple.

The dark-haired man fell backwards, momentarily stunned by the sharp blow to the head. When his vision cleared, he found Kakashi crumpled bleeding and limp, the seizure passed. Iruka moved forward automatically, pressing both palms over the blood-soaked bandage on his lover's belly. He could feel the flutter of Kakashi's weak life force struggling to seal the breach, and added his own power to the effort. From Kakashi's left hip, the mantis-faced ANBU mask that had once belonged to Shida Akumaru leered mockingly up at the chuunin.

Iruka's hands had grown numb, his mind blank, when a muted groan from the jounin brought him back to the present.

"Aunh... Ru... ru..."

"Kakashi?" Iruka sat back blearily, rubbing at the knot on the side of his head.

"You OK? Where...?" Kakashi coughed weakly, scrunching his face up, and his shoulders twitched threateningly but his body remained tensely still.

"We're... at the..." Iruka looked around, why was it so hard to think clearly?

"Leaf Aid... Station," Kakashi finished for him.

"Yeah," Iruka agreed. He gazed at the rapidly darkening clearing, at the ramshackle looking hut. If this was an aid station, shouldn't there be medics here?

"Ruka? You OK?" Kakashi coughed again, and sucked in a few rasping breaths. "Your head..."

Iruka rubbed at his temple, wiping a smear of blood away when he did. He'd... how had he hit his head? He looked around a bit more keenly, searching for any sign of an enemy presence. When his eyes lit on the mask and sword at Kakashi's side, it all came rushing back.

"Yeah. I'm OK. It's nothing. Need to get you inside." Iruka's brain was clicking again. Get Kakashi inside. Get help. Get an antidote before the poison could do further damage. The jounin had shut his eye and lay unmoving in the awkward position the seizure had left him in. Iruka squatted on his heels and leaned forward to pick him up, dreading what the motion was going to do to the injured man. He slipped an arm under Kakashi's shoulders, the other under his thighs, and lifted the silver-haired man into his lap, surprised when Kakashi responded not at all.

"Kakashi?" He had expected a groan, a shudder, at least a tightening of the jounin's muscles at being picked up. The lack of response was more alarming than a scream of pain would have been.

"Kashi? Come on! Stay with me!"

Slowly, as if from deep below the surface of a frozen lake, Kakashi answered. "Ru..."

It wasn't much, but it was enough. Iruka let out the breath he had been holding and lurched to his feet, lifting the stricken man in his arms.

That brought the scream.

Kakashi tried to stop the wretched sound before it tore loose from his raw throat. Then, almost as quickly, blood rose to follow it, choking him. He turned his head, coughing and gasping, as Iruka ran blindly up the stairs and into the little hut.

Scanning the gloomy room, Iruka spied futons on the floor, and gingerly laid Kakashi onto the pallet closest to the wall - the most defensible position - turning him on his side so he could clear the choking fluid from his lungs and throat.

When his breathing returned to the wheeze that now passed for normal, Kakashi groaned and opened his eye, looking up at Iruka. The chuunin was wiping his lips with a cloth he had procured from somewhere, a look of numb shock on his face.

"S-s-s-sorry, Ru." Kakashi breathed. His teeth had begun to chatter, and his arms and legs were shaking from their connection points at shoulders and hips.

"Are you cold? I'll get a blanket." Iruka's head whipped around. There were a couple of stained futons on the floor, a freestanding sink, some glass-fronted cabinets built into the walls. There wasn't even a proper bed. It was a sorry excuse for a medic station.

"I'll have to get the blankets from our packs. I left them outside."

"S'OK. Go..." Kakashi replied, shivering. At least the bedding was soft. At least there was a pillow. He was so tired. And so tired of how fucking bad it hurt.

ooo

It was dark and chilly in the mountain hut, the damp mist outside seeping through a thousand cracks between the boards, and the only light coming from kerosene lanterns Iruka had found while searching the place. He had forced the second draught of Tsunade's potion down the Jounin's throat when he came back with the blankets, and it had seemed to help, lessening the grit-teethed shivering and allowing the man to sleep a little.

The second dose of the ANBU elixir worked rapidly, spreading warmth and energy through Kakashi's body, suppressing pain. Chakra Support Liquid, they called it - simple, descriptive. All ANBU field operatives carried it. It did what its name implied, boosting the chakra of an injured shinobi, filling in the gaps, at least for a little while. But it took a toll, slowing down actual healing, and could impair chakra control, which is why repeated use was frowned on. And while it could handle fatigue, pain, and chakra damage, it couldn't halt the creeping effects of the nerve toxin.

Numbness crept up Kakashi's limbs, making them heavy and unresponsive. He realized with a dull dread that it was paralyzing him, and hoped it wouldn't shut down his heart or lungs. 'Probably won't,' he decided. 'What was that phrase Iruka used? maximize suffering? Akumaru was ANBU's master of torture, Ibiki's sensei, he wouldn't have used a simple poison.' He drifted in a timeless haze, neither awake nor asleep, listening to the oddly musical sounds that accompanied each painful, shallow breath.

'Now, while Kakashi has the medicine in him, I have to get him out of those soiled clothes,' Iruka decided. "I'm sorry to wake you, Kashi, but I can't let you stay in those dirty things, the risk of infection..."

"I know." Kakashi didn't even open his eye.

Iruka didn't try to lift the injured man again, afraid to set off another seizure. He used a kunai to slit the pants legs, and front and arms of the heavy sweater, and peeled the blood-stiffened material back from the pale, red-stained body of his lover. Exposed to the cool air, Kakashi shivered, moaning at the painful motion. Iruka immediately pulled up both thermal blankets and lay down next to his chilled partner, trying to transfer his own body heat to the jounin.

When the shivering subsided, Iruka spoke. "I have to change your dressings, too, Kakashi. You... that seizure... "

"I know." The response was quieter this time.

The chuunin pulled bandage rolls and more paper-wrapped clotting-jutsu sponges from the cabinets, grateful that the medical station had been left at least partly stocked. He steeled himself for the ugliness he expected to uncover, but the sight still took his breath away. Kakashi groaned when the gauze was pulled off, and his abdomen twitched ominously, but he soon fell still and silent again.

"S'bad... Ruru?" Kakashi asked after a moment, while Iruka sat frozen, staring at the gaping wound.

"It... It's not that bad."

It was bad. The seizure had torn the edges of the gash open, lengthening it, and purplish, bruised-looking coils of small intestine bulged through the gap. Black clots dotted the tissue; at least he was clotting, not continuing to bleed. And the organs themselves seemed uncut. Still, it was a horrifying sight. Not the sort of wound a man could easily survive. Iruka suppressed a shudder and set to work re-bandaging, trying to pull the edges of the wound together without hurting Kakashi too much.

For the first time, Kakashi was grateful for the creeping numbness of the nerve-deadening poison. He focused his attention on the pins and needles sensations in his arms and legs, on the throbbing behind his eyes, rather than the agonizing fire consuming his abdomen as Iruka worked to re-dress the sword wound. He ground his teeth together and panted shallowly when the chuunin moved on to the chest injury; broken ribs grated and ached under Iruka's touch, and the poisoned kunai wound was badly inflamed. He blew out a shaky, relieved breath when Iruka sat back and pulled the blankets up over his body again.

Iruka knew it had been torture. He cursed every motion he had to make, hating the knowledge that there was nothing he could do that wouldn't hurt Kakashi. He tried to forget that this was the body of his lover, to think only in terms of biology, physiology.

"You want a little water?" Iruka leaned over Kakashi, holding a bottle.

"No."

"I... I think you should try, Kakashi. That blood-chakra pill..."

"Not... yet." Kakashi's lips and tongue felt thick and clumsy.

"Please. Just a sip." Iruka's voice held a note of desperation that unnerved Kakashi. He forced his eye open, searching the face of his lover. It took incredible strength and control for him to lift one cold, dead-feeling hand and reach for the younger man's, and his whole arm shook violently. Iruka immediately grabbed on, holding the quaking appendage still. He squeezed, and was alarmed anew when Kakashi did not tighten his grip in response.

"Your hand... Can't you feel me?"

"S'OK... Iruka... I'm just... tired. Little water... Then sleep... K?"

"Hai... hai... OK." Iruka tucked Kakashi's hand back under the blankets, then gently slipped his palm under the silver hair and lifted the jounin's head, tipping a trickle of water into his mouth.

Kakashi swallowed, grimacing. The cold water was an unwelcome presence in his stomach, even if his body did need it. He closed his mouth against the bottle, refusing more than the one mouthful. When Iruka pulled it away and recapped it, Kakashi relaxed.

"Sorry, Ru... Just can't drink right now." Kakashi gave a shallow cough, but managed a weak smile.

"It's OK. Are you... Does it hurt too bad? Can you sleep?"

"Take off... hitai-ate... The knot..."

"Oh. Of course!" Iruka pulled the bandana off, exposing Kakashi's scarred eyelid, which he kept closed over the Sharingan eye. "Will you be OK like that?"

"Mmm... Sleep now." The medicine in his system quelled the worst of the pain, and his exhaustion was overwhelming. Iruka's warm presence next to him was comforting. Kakashi surfed the border of consciousness, slowly falling into an uneasy sleep.

Iruka watched the tension around Kakashi's mouth relax, the knotted brow fall slightly smoother. He listened intently, glad in a disturbing way for the regular burbling wheeze that told him his lover was still drawing breath. Kakashi had told him that unlocking the barrier on the aid station would send a signal for help, that a medic would answer the summons, but the waiting was torture.

To calm himself, Iruka decided to keep a log, to track what had happened. He and Kakashi would have to complete mission reports, he reasoned, even though this hadn't started out as a mission. Well, Kakashi's had. And he was going to make it back to Konoha and he was going to have to complete a mission report. And killing Shida Akumaru could be considered a general assignment for any shinobi of the Leaf who happened to encounter him.

He started with an account of his message from Kakashi, his suspicion that he had been followed, their meeting. He was careful how he worded it - even if their relationship was not something anyone would frown at, it wasn't necessarily something he wanted documented in the annals of Konohagakure. He carefully detailed the encounter with the rogue former ANBU, Kakashi's horrifying fight, the aftermath, and how they had ended up at this dismal sanctuary.

"Sunday, 17:30 - Arrived at sta." Iruka wrote. "Hatake Kakashi condition deteriorating. Seizures. Resp. distress. Administered ANBU-CSL. Patient stabilized." He used the shorthand typical of this kind of report.

"18:00 - HK condition survey: existing injuries - several day-old bruise to right cheek, severe bruising and suspected fracture(s) to left ribcage apx. 19 cm below armpit. Observed combat wounds: 1st - apx. 21 cm slash extending from navel to rt. groin above hip. Penetrates to viscera but not through. Small bowel bruised, no obvious perforation. 2nd - Kunai penetration between suspected fx. ribs on left side. Wound transverse, apx. 5 cm. Unknown neuro. poison introduced through kunai wound."

He stopped writing, fighting to maintain his detachment, listening for each rasp of breath in and out of Kakashi's slack mouth. He gingerly touched Kakashi's cheek, feeling for fever, then his hands and feet, finding them icy. 'He needs blood. Where's that fucking medic?' Iruka looked at his pocket watch, then resumed writing.

"18:30 - HK sleeping. Breathing raspy. No obvious fever. Extremities cold. Blood loss amt. unknown but considerable. Administered one dose kinketsueki in field, apx 16:15. Next dose 20:15, if HK able to ingest H2O"

He continued to write, detailing each step he had taken in caring for Kakashi. Writing it all out like this made it a little easier, at least for now, to regain his cool shinobi detachment. It was shattered though, when Kakashi shifted in his sleep, moaned, and croaked out Iruka's name.

He was only partly awake, wasn't even aware he had called for Iruka. But when the chuunin lifted the lantern to illuminate Kakashi's face, it set off a cavalcade. He must have unconsciously opened the Sharingan, or maybe it was just a new level of torment from the poison, but the light flooded in like a knife in the brain, and Kakashi's body reacted. A shudder passed through him, then his head snapped back, spine bowed into a devastating arch, and his arms and legs vibrated with a violent, spastic tension. The vibrations grew until they were shaking his whole frame. A guttural cry rose from his chest as the seizing muscles forced the air out of his aching lungs and tore at the belly wound. The sound rasped to a halt, though, as Kakashi's breathing stopped, held hostage by the iron-like tension arcing his back.

Iruka was beside himself. He dropped the lantern, extinguishing it, and rammed his hands under Kakashi's head, trying to prevent him from suffering a head injury during the convulsion. Time stretched and slowed to an infinitesimal pace, and Iruka watched helplessly as pain and panic flashed in Kakashi's wide eyes. It was both a greater horror and a mercy when the jounin lost consciousness, his lips taking on a bluish hue from lack of oxygen.

Then as suddenly as it had started, the seizure relented, and Kakashi fell limp, chest heaving as he sucked in desperately needed air. Iruka jerked the twisted blankets back, exposing what he had feared, a rapidly expanding, bright red blot soaking the bandage over the injured man's abdomen. He tore the gauze away and slapped one of the clotting sponges over the gash, compressing it tightly and directing a healing jutsu into the wound. The jutsu, this action, was almost becoming familiar to him. He feared the bleeding would never stop, but it did, and he leaned back, breathing shakily.

Iruka had not a moment's rest, though, for Kakashi began to choke and cough, bubbles of blood rising between his unconscious, parted lips. Iruka gagged, overwhelmed for a moment by the horror of it all, but quickly recovered himself. He turned Kakashi onto his side and bent his head forward to make it easier for him to clear his airway, wiping away the mess he coughed up with yet more gauze held in shaking hands. When the jounin's breathing returned to normal, Iruka eased him onto his back again, not wanting to place additional strain on the abdominal wound.

As he started to come around, Kakashi groaned, tossing his head from side to side, gasps of pain issuing from the mostly unconscious man. Iruka ransacked the hut, dashing from cabinet to cabinet, throwing doors open, yanking drawers out, searching for something, anything, to ease Kakashi's distress. At last he found a cache of vials and syringes. He grabbed several and was back at the jounin's side in a flash, where he drew the drug into the syringe and injected it into Kakashi's arm in almost a single motion, his many hours of field medic training coming into play flawlessly.

Iruka straightened his back, anxiously watching Kakashi as he waited for the morphine to take effect. When the tension eased away from the jounin's features and his panting breaths slowed and quieted, Iruka dropped the empty vial and syringe he had been unconsciously holding, and they clattered to the wooden floor and rolled away. The chuunin's hands were shaking uncontrollably as he leaned back against the wall. He stared dully around, then picked up the pen again.

"19:00," he wrote, then paused, "Bright light brought on another seizure, caused abd. wound to reopen, resp. bleeding and distress. Administered chakra first aid and morphine 12 mg IM."

He opened his watch with still shaking hands, closed it, stared hard at Kakashi, listening to his rasping breath for a moment, then wrote, "19:30 - HK stable."

He couldn't bring himself to write it down, but the words echoed in his head. 'You did this to him. You led Akumaru to him. You might as well have held the kunai yourself.' He put the pen down again, picked up one of Kakashi's cold hands, and stared at the red-stained fingertips.

"I'm so sorry, Kashi," he whispered to the unconscious jounin, "Please, please don't die." Before he could stop himself, before Rule 25 could take effect, his fatigue and fear got the best of him, and Iruka found himself shaking with silent, sobbing tears.

ooo

In a bigger medical station, far to the south, a message was delivered. Two shinobi, presumably of the Leaf, had entered a disused shelter belonging to Konoha but situated outside the Fire Country's borders. The correct seal had been used, the one indicating that they were in distress, that aid was requested. Arashida Numa was next up for assignment. An older woman by shinobi standards, Numa was 54, a ninja of the Mist, but currently wearing the blank hitai-ate and unmarked clothing of the Neutral Medical Corps of the Five Villages. She had been part of its founding along with Konoha's leader, the Godaime Hokage. It was fate, she decided that put her in the position of responding to the distress call of two of Tsunade's own.

The short woman filled her pack with supplies, wondering what she would encounter. There were no active wars in the area, but shinobi had a way of getting themselves hurt pretty badly. She shrugged her vest on, strapped a weapon's pouch to her waist - she was a medic, but she was also a ninja, and she would not walk into a potentially hostile situation such as this unarmed - shouldered her pack, and set off for her summoning tower. She would call upon the bat spirits again - the pair who had relayed the distress call would have already notified their clan that they would be wanted. A huge, leathery-winged creature rose to greet her, and with a bow of gratitude and respect, Numa mounted its furry back and rode into the darkening sky.

End Chapter 10

ooo ooo ooo

Japanese words:

mayaku no senbon - narcotic or illegal drug senbon

Author's Note:

Is it too much? Please review and tell me what you think.

Thanks to all who have reviewed so far. Your encouragement and feedback are priceless to me. I re-read them again and again, to encourage myself when I feel stuck.

For faith-b, who inquired - my health continues to be erratic, which definitely has an effect on how frequently I can update. Thanks for your patience and forbearance. And for your reviews, which I always look forward to.

Extra special thanks to:

HikaruxYuki, L-lamb, Momo-chan, WinterofourDiscontent, Hey-Diddle-Diddle and Pesha Vashti for early reads and feedback.

Hey-Diddle-Diddle for the name of the mayaku no senbon.

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