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"No, no, never in any life time, no, maybe, oh my god." Temari paused in her recitation of disapproval to form a disgusted face, eyes shamelessly scanning the focus of her attention with no care for how the young man on the other end of it might feel. "No wonder you don't have a boyfriend, the selection around here is shitty."

Elbows taking up most of the their little street side café table and shoulders arched up so high his back seemed to bend between them, Shikamaru glanced up from the iced tea he was idly stirring.

"Stop glaring like that, Temari, you're going to give him a heart attack," he said in a low drawl, gaze passing indifferently over the surrounding crowd.

"Tsk." She dismissed him, snatching up her glass in one long fingered hand and taking a long pull on the straw. "I'm going to bring you home to Sand with me," she said, "Show you what real men look like."

"I don't need any dating help," he said, scowling in annoyance. If he'd known that the Sand jounin was going to latch onto his sexuality like this, he would have put more effort into hiding it.

"Who said anything about dating?" Temari said around her straw, giving him a sideways look, "I'd settle for just getting you laid."

"When did I become your pet project?" Shikamaru groused, flicking at a few drops of water on the wrought iron table. Around them, the noontime crowd moved in ebbs and flows of action and speech. It was lively without being rushed; the relaxed but purposefully atmosphere of a village that was doing well for itself.

"When I saved your life," Temari said as she looked around for another prospect, crossing her legs under the yukata she'd taken to wearing during her visit. It was an unspeakably impractical outfit and when he'd questioned her on it, she had tightly replied that she was an official representative of her village and it would be in his best interest not to bring it up again.

"That was years ago," he protested half-heartedly, rubbing above his left eyebrow with cold, damp fingers.

"Uh huh." The point was clearly not up for discussion. "Hey, you know that person, right?" Temari gestured with her glass at a passing Leaf-nin.

Shikamaru braced his chin against his fist and slowly drifted his attention in the indicated direction. Recognition brightened his otherwise sullen and bored expression.

"Yeah, that's Hyuuga Neji," he said, watching the young jounin stop and engage in a conversation with an associate, "He was on my team for that failed retrieval mission. We've worked together a few other times since then."

"Thought he looked familiar. He's a lot less bloody this time," Temari said, eyebrow rising as the skin around Shikamaru's eyes flinched slightly at the reminder. "Hmm...you know..." she trailed off thoughtfully, nail taping the side of her cup and fierce blue eyes full of speculation.

Shikamaru was instantly suspicious. "No."

"He's cute," she said, ignoring him, "Oi, Hyuuga!" The last was shouted as Temari half-rose from her chair, hand cupping around the side of her mouth to project her voice. When Neji turned his head their way to acknowledge the summon, she waved him over. He nodded once in acceptance and finished up his conversation.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes, mentally bemoaning the orders that left him playing guard duty to this monster woman. Temari settled back into her chair with a smug little smirk.

"You're insane," he said flatly as Neji started toward their table.

"Shut up, I know what I'm doing," Temari said with a sniff, putting down her glass with a click and gripping her knee with both hands.

"Temari-san, Shikamaru," the jounin said in a neutral tone when he reached them, stopping a few feet before their table. The same neutrality carried over to his expression; brows smooth below his headband and lips resting together lightly. It wasn't an open or welcoming expression, and there was a definite sense of self-importance in the way he carried himself, but it also wasn't the same cold haughtiness that would have been there less then three years ago.

"Neji," Shikamaru said in greeting, leaning back in his chair. Scheming kunoichi aside, Neji was one of his co-workers and superiors.

"You doing anything tonight?" Temari asked flat out. With her back ramrod straight and her eyes narrowed fiercely, she looked less like someone trying to set up a friend than someone conducting an invasion on a foreign country.

Neji frowned slightly, white eyes evaluating the women addressing him so abruptly. "I am having dinner with my clan. Did you require assistance with something?" All of sudden, Neji's focus obviously shifted. "I was under the impression that Shikamaru was supposed to attend to your needs while in Konoha."

Temari's eyebrows flew up while Shikamaru let out a dark chuckle.

"I warned them I'd start shirking my duties first chance I got," Shikamaru leered, folding his arms behind his head.

"I'm just surprised it took this long," Neji said in clear disapproval that was at odds with the faint smirk lurking around the corners of his mouth. He seemed to gather himself and nodded to Temari, waiting pointedly.

She was watching them both in wiry amusement. "We could use a third head while we're going over the last of the exam paperwork this evening." There was a small mountain of forms and treaties that had to be signed, double, and triple checked before Sand could begin opening its gates to the other villages.

"Afterward you can take that out to dinner and off my hands for the night," she continued, waving her hand at Shikamaru and ignoring his muttered 'off your hands?'

Neji pressed his lips together, considering, then inclined his head. "That is acceptable to me. What time should we meet?"

After discussing the details of their get together, Neji excused himself to wrap up some other business.

"Well, well," Temari said once he'd gone, "Looks like you'll be getting lucky tonight after all."

"Shut up, you don't know what you're talking about." Shikamaru pushed himself up from the table, honestly annoyed with her. The protest was more whiney then angry though and Temari brushed it away with a laugh.

"Better get practicing on your kissing," she taunted him, briefly puckering her lips at him, "You know, I bet he's a - "

"I'm not listening to you anymore."

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