Still, I worry about hurting her more than being hurt.

And then there's Jubilee. If I could call anyone my little girl, it'd be her. She's full of her own fire. She makes me smile. I surely don't do that enough.

I worry about hurting her, too.

This thing with Kurt has me tied in knots over the two of them. I want their understanding. Everyone else can go to hell if they don't approve as far as I care, but not my girls. Not Jeanie. Not Jubilee.

.....

I sat down with Jeanie first. Took her out for coffee. I'm not a coffee man at all, but it didn't seem quite like bar talk. I know Kurt told Kitty at a bar, but that was his lookout. With Jean, it had to be over coffee.

She sat there, sipping her cappuccino and just looking at me. That intense, unnerving look of hers. The look she uses when she knows you're keeping something from her.

"So," she smiled, pushing a lock of hair from her face. "Come here often?"

As if she didn't know I stuck out like a sore thumb among all those young, well-dressed people.

I just grunted, normal evasion technique, and looked real interested in my cup of black coffee.

I heard her sigh. Then, she put her hand on mine.

"What is wrong with you, Logan? You know you can talk to me. About anything"

That was that. I told her. I told her everything.

She looked at me. Then she laughed.

Usually, she'll turn her head and laugh, and I'll feel weak. Just like the first time I saw her. Not that she was laughing then, but...she's always been so luminous.

This time, she just made me fucking angry.

She figured out real quick that I was pretty serious. And pretty pissed.

"Logan...I... I didn't mean to laugh. Really. I'm just...well...shocked." She looked at me for a moment, then she laughed again, embarrassed and slightly nervous. She stared at her mug before murmuring, "You're so straight."

She said it so straight faced, I had to start laughing. It broke the tension pretty well.

"Don't expect me to start wearing tight jeans or singin' Streisand or anything, Jeanie," I managed. "But I wanted to tell you."

Because I have to be level with her. Because we have this connection. Because I actually feel guilty about caring for someone besides her in this way. For loving someone else.

And she knows that.

She finally raised her head and smiled at me. It was kind of a weak smile, but it was a smile.

"Well, I hope he makes you happy. If he doesn't…well, I'll hang him up by his tail somewhere and let Jubilee use him for target practice." She scowled slightly. She meant it.

"Have you talked to her yet, by the way?"

I shook my head. "No. I wanted to tell you first."

A bigger smile. "I'm easier, huh?"

"Yeah."

She looked at me, that smile still on her lips. I felt my heart leap slightly. Then, she leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek.

"Good luck, Logan. I love you."

I breathed in, inhaling the scent of her. She smelled like roses, like spring mornings, like love.

"I love you too, Jeanie. I love you too."

.....

So Jeanie was as understanding as I thought she'd be. Still, I'm not ready to tell the kid. I'm supposed to be ready. I'm taking her out today. For a movie and ice cream. I'm supposed to be ready.

"Yo, Wolvie!"

I hear her voice a split second before she tackles me. Not like she can knock me over, but the girl does give mean hugs.

Her crazy mop of black hair tilts up from the vice-grip of my chest, and she gives me a toothy grin. "You brought the cash, didn't ya?"

"You always keep the important things in mind, don't ya, kid?"

Jubilee grins again and breaks her hug. She stands there, hands in the pockets of her shabby jeans, rocking back and forth. "Yup. Cash. Ice cream. Cars. Can I drive?"

"Not in this lifetime. Get in the passenger side."

"Aw, Wolvie! I've got my license. I've had it for ever and I am so safe."

That impudent grin doesn't say anything about safety and I just shake my head. "Get in the passenger side, Jubilee." Gotta work fast before she charms her way into getting what she wants.

For once, the tactic actually works. She whines her way into the passenger seat, but gets in.

She starts whistling a little tune as we drive off. Rolls down the window and sticks her head out. Pretends like she's driving, pressing her foot all the way to the floorboard. Then, she cocks her head at me like an overly curious pup. "So, what're we gonna see?"

I reach over and pop open the glove compartment. "Whatever you want. The paper's in there."

Another little whistle and the rustle of paper. The compartment shuts with a click.

"Ooooh. High Art. I heard that's a good one."

"That ain't some chick flick, is it?"

"Nah. Not really. It's supposed to be dramatic or something."

"Hmm. Okay, we'll try it. But I'm warning you kid, if it's sappy..."

...
After the movie
...

She scuffs her toe nervously in the dirt as we sit on the park bench. "Well, it wasn't sappy...," she trails off as she licks the strawberry ice cream dribbling from the cone.

I study her for a long moment. "Wasn't too bad," I reply distractedly.

"Good actresses, huh?" Jubilee scuffs her toe again, seemingly very interested in the ants scurrying around her foot. She'd inadvertently squashed their home.

"Yup. I liked the dark-haired one."

"Oh, yeah," she says dreamily. Catching herself, she coughs and looks at me out of the corner of her eye.

I return the look. "What?"

She looks away and coughs again. "Nothing."

We sit for a while. The birds chirp in the trees and the grass whistles ever so quietly in the wind. Finally, Jubilee can't seem to stand it and breaks the silence. Rather loudly.

"Okay, okay, just ask me already!"

I blink and look at her, still distracted by the birds. "Ask you what?"

"Oh, c'mon Wolvie! I know you're just dying to say, 'Hey, kid, why'd we just watch a lesbian movie?'"

I blink again and smile slightly. "Because it was a good movie?"

She looks at me blankly, then puts a hand to her head and groans, "Nevermind. Just nevermind."

There've been times in my life when my mind wasn't exactly the sharpest blade. This is one of those times. It takes a long moment for the idea to penetrate the warm ice cream, bird fuzz in my brain. The fact that I'm thinking about blue fuzz doesn't help either. But, it finally gets in. I give her a funny look. "You trying to tell me something, kid?"

She seems to shrink up small, smaller than normal. "Um. Maybe? I mean, what would you say if I said that I kinda sorta really like this girl at school and we've kinda sorta been seeing each other which kinda sorta makes us girlfriends which actually really means I'm a lesbian? I mean, what would you sat to that?"

It's just too rich. I have to laugh. She gives me an annoyed, hurt look, and I'm suddenly on the opposite side of the table in Jean's shoes. But at least I've got something to say. "What would _you_ say if I said that I 'kinda sorta' have been seeing an old friend of mine who happens to be a guy which 'kinda sorta' makes us boyfriends?"

Her wide-eyed look is priceless. "You're gay too, Wolvie?"

I scratch my head. Good question. "Well...if you want to use titles. I still like women. I just...I like this guy a lot. It's good."

Jubilee leans forward conspiratively. "It's somebody at the mansion, isn't it? Have you done it? Is it...eeeww, is it Cyke? I always knew he was uptight about something! What'd Jean say? Did she want to watch?"

"Where the fuck did you get those ideas!" I practically explode. I'm sure I have an interesting expression on my face. "It's Kurt! Who else would I sleep with?"

She actually giggles. "The blue guy with the tail? Oh, he's cute! So, you did do it...cool."

This conversation is creeping me out. "Isn't it supposed to be gross hearing about older people's sex lives?" Especially when they're your father figure, I add to myself.

For some reason, she's not grossed out. In fact, she's completely at ease now. "Well, I'm dating Monet so now we're even. And I'm allowed to ask about your sex life you just can't ask about mine."

"Oh, that's real logical."

"Sure it is. If I ask you, I'm just being curious. If you ask me, you're being perverted."

"You're strange, kid."

"Queer all the way through." At that, she bursts out laughing and puts her head on my shoulder.

Everything's quiet again. Just the birds and the wind. I realize, suddenly, that this has to be one of those surreal dream sequences. Any moment now, I'm going to wake up. Any moment now the clock's going to go off, the radio'll come on and I'll hear....

"So, is he good with the tail?"