Subreality Times
Glory, glory hallelujah. Whoopee. Woohoo. Much rejoicing and
stuff. What do you mean,
"why"? Look above. Noooo, not at the ceiling, genius. Look at the
date! It's my baby's birthday
today. Subreality Times, despite of all cynics, lasted a month.
Yay. I'll accept cash or
checks. Most of the major credit cards. I'm
magnanimous like that. Ask anybody...
Anyhoo, onward! The gossip awaits!
The Bullet:
Ok. As much as it pains me to admit it, I need to apologize. You
people were pretty decent
this week and made enough messes to make this rag look
presentable. Thanks. Didn't think
you had it in ya... Keep up the good work.
Well, as always some things come first. CFAN has been updated
again. And there is a new
feature fanfic. I read it. Crept the freak outta me. Well... not
all of the freak. (For those who
missed the joke -don't worry about it, I am weird like that.)
Also... ahh, I could kiss the bugger, only I can't. ITW really
came through. For the
unenlightened, ITW AKA Inside The Web is the service hosting many,
many, many Message
Boards. It's also about as reliable as our weather reports.
Feeling neglected and under the
weather (HEH! I made a funny! Get it? Weather report -under the
weather?... you know?... pun
there is weather and... under... metaphor there... ahh, forget
it.) ITW decided to show us just
how puny we really are. Insert "Muahaha" here. Unable to think of
anything better the service
horfed. Not very imaginative but it worked. The consequences later
down. Heh, am I a master
of suspense or what?
Current Affairs:
Metropolitan news:
The instigator of the event is rumored to be Lyssie and her
writer, Ana. They were last seen
heading for Antarctica. Flame and The Captain on other hand were
last seen at the Arsenal.
For details check out "Frankie's Angels: The Case of a Missing
Case" by Ana Lyssie Cotton.
Under hushed silence the X-Vaults were opened this week. And what
came out... Well what
came out - came out. Nothing we can do about it now. Kidding,
kidding. So far three long-lost
interviews conducted by Rossi with some of the premiere authors in
comic fanfiction were
released. Check 'em out.
The Subreality Café franchise continues to grow and prosper. Wish
I'd bought stock. A new
place has been opened, for the Highlander fictives. And I assume
various other immortals
since Kenny was also seen there. A newcomer's, Troll Princess,
services were retained as a
manager for the place. More details in "Spice Girls Karaoke Is
Punishable By Death."
On an unrelated note. Contrary to popular belief I am not
hardworking. Very lazy in fact. So
this fashion to write titles a mile long better be a fad. Ya hear
me? (Looks at no-one in
particular. Especially not at Ms. Cotton or Her Troll Highness)
Moving on. God, I miss slow news weeks. Oy.
As we promised the picture of new SCML mascot wasn't at all long
in coming. You may thank
us later. And if you hear the laughable claims that some portion
of the credit should go to the
artist herself, Tapestry... Well, they are laughable. All she did
was draw the thing. Ok, two of
them. Big deal. I could too, if I could draw a straight line with
a ruler. So what, that it was Farli
that got this thing started? Pheh.
In any case, there are now two versions of the Subreality Dragon
floating around. Being
completely unbiased, here are my descriptions. There is a
chibified, cute one. And then there
is the one you WILL vote for if you know what's good for you! And
regarding the name. It
SHALL be Yang or I'll know the reason why. And then tell
everybody.
Moving along. The "Requiem" RR resumed its pace after a minor
hiccup. Epona Harper has
been sworn in as a new chief of security at THOSD.
Other News:
Also you may congratulate me. Being bored and... well that's it.
Just bored. I started a minor
scientific experiment. I am happy to say that it was a moderate
success.
HAH! Who am I kidding?! I'm the best! I'm the smartest! I'm the
handsomest! And the
modestest!
The experiment was an unmitigated success. If you want details,
check out Rant and Rave
MB. The thread that starts with Paradoqz' post shall be thy Mecca.
An unexpected side-effect
was that now every second poster feels the need to add pictures
and colors to their posts. On
all MBs. This vanity has to stop, people. You are wasting valuable
Praise The Doqz time.
In any case, in my opinion, the success of this thread is a good
sign. No community is really
THAT bad off as long as they retain the ability to laugh at
themselves... My God, am I DEEP!
Moving on.
Much to my surprise the previous thread did produce a result.
There is now a new IRC room,
called #subreality. Three guesses as to its purpose. No, it is NOT
for THAT! Perverts.
The room was christened recently. In words of SCity citizen
Acetal, "This could be the
beginning of a beautiful room. As soon as we remove the
bloodstains and get new wallpaper."
It was fun. Epona Harper got a little bit tipsy and was hit upon
the noggin twice. With a bat.
There is also some action observed on Duke Out board. As far as I
can tell it's, in the words of
out Lady Scribe, "an argument where to have an argument."
(Warning: rampant misquotation
due to laziness to check with original)
Scratching Post has also been busy. The Pokemon discussion thread
has been pushed out
by the Vending Machine debate. Would I kid you?
Also it pains me to admit that our prognosis was wrong and a
"boom" on Behind The Scenes
MB failed to blossom. Eh.
However there is a thread that would probably draw attention of
that portion of the Subreal
populace that enjoy watching grown men in speedos beat each
other's brains out with chairs
and stuff. That thread is on Rant and Rave board and is starting
with a post "Dear Opponent"
by The Purple Evader -- SCWF North American Champion.
Last but not least. The Raven admiration society thread on
Scratching Post has grown,
multiplied and mutated. There is now talk of releasing swimsuit
calendars. That's right, not one
of them but two. Draw your own conclusions, I'm too scared.
Weather report:
Catch ya later.
Back to the living room
Issue #6
Monday 6th, June, 2000
It took a direct hit of ITW's wrath to slow down Eco-Challenge RR.
But even IT couldn't bring it
to a complete halt. Although the SCRR MB suffered a significant
setback with several posts
disappearing into abyss of the mystery that is the 'net, the
reconstruction is proceeding fairly
quickly and we theorize that the production will resume shortly.
For the SCML citizens. True to her word, Lady Scribe continues on
course with her previously
indicated program of improving the site. The recovered works of
lore continue to be archived.
The progress however was impeded by a trio of Muses. Apparently
there was "Charlie's
Angels" night on TBS and no one told me. Well, thaaaank you!
Ungrateful bastards. Anyway,
whatever the case may be, and whenever the inspiration came from
the results were fairly
evident as the astonished residents of Subreality City were
treated to the sight of Lyssie, the
Captain and Flame prancing around in revealing clothes and
generally making a complete
spectacle of themselves.
More on this as develops.
Minor details. I'm sure if you try hard enough you'll figure SOME
way that I'm to thank for this.
If you can't, you are not making the effort. No cookie for you!
The Message Boards blew up. Apparently that little thing with ITW
served as a catalyst. I see
no other explanation. Shortly before the incident there was a
maaahvelously acid-dripping
thread on Rant and Rave regarding the admittance to #subcafe. It
got swallowed. Right in time
thankfully, as I was getting severely tempted to dive right in
there and have fun in the mud. As
it is I get to sit on my high horse and chuckle sarcastically at
all the little peoples down below.
Haha. See? Fuuuun.
(sniff) Gosh, that man has a way with words.
Like I said.
Fun.
Gather all ye earthly baskets and vessels and all that other
stuff. It's raining feedback on
ThreePenny Lane
all week.