Hana was tattooed when she was three. It's her first memory, and it goes like this:

Mama has her kneel at the table. There're things there, like needles, and there's a pot of red paint. There's a fire, too, banked on the side, and Mama holds the needles over the fire, 'til they're red hot.

It hurts.

She screams, and screams, and screams, and Mama tells her to be quiet, to be a big girl.

Hana cries after that, and the tears wet the gauze on her cheeks.

Hana's an Inuzuka now.

x

Hana got her dogs when she was seven. It's her happiest memory, and it goes like this:

Mama tells her to get up, and Hana does so. It's really late, or maybe it's really early, but that doesn't matter. Hana's just excited to be up right now, when the moon's full and the sky's dark.

Mama takes her to another house, and when Hana goes in, she can smell blood and dogs.

There are puppies, three of them, and Mama tells her they're hers, now.

Hana stays up all night, staring at the puppies, newborn and blind, wet and bloody and perfect.

Hana's an Inuzuka now.

x

Hana graduated from the Academy when she was eleven. It's another memory, and it goes like this:

Mama's kneeling in front of her, helping her put her hitai-ate on straight. Kiba's clutching Mama's vest, and Hana wants to hug Kiba as hard as she can.

It's a hot day, and when Hana looks up, the sun burns her eyes.

Kuromaru whines, and Mama tells her she's proud of her, that Hana's done good.

Hana touches her hitai-ate again and again, metal cold again her fingertips.

Hana's an Inuzuka now.

x

Hana killed her first man when she was thirteen. It's her most frightening memory, and it goes like this:

He's huge, taller than her by more than a few inches, and he outweighs her by more than she cares to think. He's fast, he's strong, and he's grabbing her neck, throwing her into a tree.

Katsu's behind the ninja, and Hana can see Akira's shape, fading into the edges of her eyes.

The ninja is on her, fingers wrapping around her neck, and he tells her she's going to die.

Katsu rips out his throat, and Akira rips out his throat, and Amaya rips out his throat, and Hana rips out his stomach.

Hana's an Inuzuka now.

x

Hana had her first crush when she was fourteen. It's her most embarassing memory, and it goes like this:

He's a sensei for a genin-chuunin team, and she's in the chuunin exam with the two students who are still genin. They brag about their sensei for hours, and when Hana sees him, she understands.

Asuma's gruff, a mess of stubble and cigarettes. The smell of the cigarettes is sharp to Hana's nose.

She stands next to him, tired and bloody, after her solo fight, and he tells her she did well.

Hana gives him a bit of a smile and feels pride in her chest.

Hana's an Inuzuka now.

x

Hana lost her first friend when she was nineteen. It's her worst memory, and it goes like this:

Akira's bleeding out in the dirt, back twisted in a way that's entirely unnatural, and Hana's running down the cliffside, tripping and scrambling and sliding. Amaya and Katsu are somewhere behind her, she thinks, but she can't stop to look, because Akira's bleeding.

It hurts.

She screams, and screams, and screams. Akira's crying and dying, and Hana's screaming as she shoves her hands against Akira's body, threading her fingers through his red-grey-red-gray fur.

Chakra doesn't stop the bleeding.

She limps home, Amaya and Katsu dragging along behind her, and they leave Akira, 'cause she can't carry his body.

Hana's an Inuzuka now.

x

Hana had a baby when she was twenty-four. It's her most calming memory, and it goes like this:

The baby's very red, and very small, and very beautiful. Baby smell, clean and fresh and perfect, is wonderful to Hana's nose, and Hana holds the baby close, just to be sure the baby's still there.

It's perfect. Hana doesn't think anything has ever been better.

Kiba comes, and Mama, too, and Kiba tells her the baby's ugly, like a monkey, and Mama tells her the baby's perfect, like she was.

Hana kisses the baby's forehead, the hair soft as fur, and smiles.

Hana's an Inuzuka now.

x

Hana died when she was twenty-eight. It's her last memory, and it goes like this:

She's lying on her back, fingers resting in her stomach, and she's staring up at the sun. Her mouth is filling with blood, and she thinks she might be drowning, because she never learned to swim.

It hurts.

The sun is blinding, and the dirt beneath her is warm. Her fingers are slick, and she can smell blood.

She wants to scream for Mama, 'cause she's drowning, and she can't swim, not when her limbs are so heavy. The sun tells her it's too late, it's too late, it's too late.

Amaya and Katsu are next to her, red-grey-red-gray, and she can't look for Akira, because she's drowning in the dust.

Hana's not an Inuzuka anymore.

Back to Chuunin and Jounin
Back to the main page