"Kakashi?"

"Hmm...?" Kakashi glanced up from his book to see a very irritated looking Iruka standing in front of him with both hands planted firmly on his hips.

"What happened to my favourite shuriken?" The Chuunin held up the weapon with a frown and indicated several chunks taken out of the edges. For some reason the throwing blade was also bright orange.

"Naruto."

"Oh." Iruka looked hard at the copy-nin for a moment, "and why did Naruto have my favourite shuriken?"

Kakashi considered telling Iruka that he'd been using the weapon to teach Naruto the value of well aimed paintballs and how they could show your enemy?s position... and decided that probably wasn?t an option.

Iruka glared sternly down at Kakashi over the rims of his wire framed glasses. "Well?" he demanded.

The copy-nin absently flipped a page and wondered if Iruka knew he looked almost identical to illustration 12, cunningly entitled 'Fun with Professor Spankums'?

Probably not, he decided after a thoughtful moment.

The schoolteacher nudged him with a sandaled toe, but not too hard. It was not a good idea to startle highly-strung Jounin, you could find yourself slapped into a few good walls and then trussed up neatly with ribbons whilst they apologised for their (often strange) reflexes. Sometimes bows were involved. Pink ones.

"Are you even listening to me?"

"Hmm...? Oh, yes. I'll have the blue one, please."

Not that Chuunin - particularly very frustrated ones - are a good idea to mess with either, Kakashi realised as he dodged a wooden bookend.

"You're so...!" apparently words failed Iruka, so he snatched up another bookend instead. With practised aim he threw it, and - this time taking into account which way the copy-nin was likely to dodge - managed to nail volume six of Icha Icha Paradise to the nearest wall.

Kakashi let out a single, strangled yell of horror before he was tackled by an armful of angry teacher determined to take advantage of his momentary distraction.

After a brief tussle around the room, Iruka managed to come out on top by unfairly using his knowledge of the Jounin's ticklish sides. Kakashi stared breathlessly up at the smaller man straddling him and felt his mouth stretch into a wide grin... and then he remembered the book and glared. Judging by Iruka's laugh he hadn't managed to pull off the expression as he'd quite hoped.

Then, as the Chuunin pulled down his mask and captured his lips in a warm kiss, he realised he didn't care quite so much anymore...

No, wait. His Icha Icha Paradise had been defiled! (Which took quite a lot of doing when you considered the content of the actual books) that called for some sort of revenge, surely?

He took a quick look through the more X-rated parts of his mind and then smiled.

"Hey, Iruka?"

"Mmm...?"

"You still have that wooden ruler?

"...yes, why?"

"Have I ever told you that you look very good in those glasses?"

Who needed Icha Icha Paradise when he had the real thing?

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